Judgey McJudgerson's Answer to your BBQ Blues

I don't know about where you live - except I sort of do because think most of you live more or less near me - but here in Baltimore, we had a little taste of sweltering mid-summer earlier this week and, although we've returned to a soggy, chilly version of spring, I now have the back yard cookout on the brain. Of course, regular readers will recall that my love for my grill knows no season, but once the mercury hits 70 or higher, there's no turning back.

However, regular readers may also recall my disdain for bottled marinades, sauces and dressings. Honestly, read the back of the average bottle of mass produced commercial bbq sauce, marinade or salad dressing and tell me if you don't see just a few things that you might not want to ingest or, at the very least, items you don't understand or recognize. I do not have in my pantry, nor do I know where to obtain, Xanthan Gum. Sodium Benzoate does not sound delicious. Potassium Sorbate could be embalming fluid for all I know.

Sauces, marinades and dressings should impart flavor...that's their whole job. They should not require of their users an advance chemistry degree. They should not last through the apocalypse. They should just taste good. Therefore, you should make them yourselves. Regular readers may also recall that I proclaimed judgement on anyone not willing to make their own BBQ sauce. That may sound harsh, but seriously, what is holding you back? Here, I'll help.

In fact, I consider the arena of marinades my particular culinary strength. Stock your pantry with a few simple, flavorful staples and there is no poultry you cannot baste, no steak you cannot tenderize, no fish you cannot render, well, un-fishy. Of course, I have a few dozen staples in my pantry, but my relationship with food is intense and complicated and may or may not require eventual intervention.

Although I have thus far refused to share my traditional BBQ sauce recipe with anyone not blood related to me, I am going to get you started with a tasty and unique condiment that will spice up your spring grilling and then some. I am guessing a few of the ingredients might require a trip to the grocery store for some of you, but once you buy them, you'll find new and interesting ways to use them if you try. (Homemade salad dressing anyone?) As always, I encourage you to alter everything to your personal tastes and experiment freely! As my almost three year old illustrates everyday, everything is better when it is yours, all yours and nobody else's!

Chinese BBQ Sauce

Ingredients:

{Note: Mirin, Hoisin, Five Spice Powder and Siracha are all available in the Asian foods aisle of better grocery stores. When in doubt, shop Whole Foods.}

3 T. Mirin

1/4 c. Soy sauce

3 T. Hoisin Sauce

1 1/2 T. Fresh ginger

1 tsp. garlic powder or 1 clove fresh garlic

1 tsp. coriander

2 tsp. Five Spice Powder ( a prepared blend of licorice root, cinnamon, anise, fennel seed and ground cloves used in Asian cooking)

1/2 tsp. red pepper flake (or more to taste)

1 - 2 tsp Siracha or Chili-garlic paste (a prepared Asian condiment)

Instructions:

Combine all ingredients and whisk thoroughly to combine. Marinate bone-in chicken pieces (as in photo above) or other poultry, skewered shrimp or scallops, beef kabobs, pork tenderloin or chops (or anything else you can think of) in sauce for an hour before cooking, turning occasionally. Then, continue to baste on sauce while grilling over medium high heat to avoid flare ups since sauce has high sugar content. If you want to use the remaining marinade as additional dipping sauce after cooking, bring it to a quick boil before serving to render out any bacteria from raw proteins.

Chocolate Orange Zest Ice Cream

In my 7th month of pregnancy I bought an ice-cream machine. In my 10th month (because that's how long you're really pregnant), I actually made ice cream. It was dangerously easy.

6 oz dark chocolate, finely chopped
2 cups whole milk
2 cups heavy cream
Zest of two oranges
1 cup sugar
3 egg yolks
1 tsp vanilla

In a medium sauce pan over medium-low heat, combine milk, cream, zest and chocolate.

In a bowl mix together sugar, eggs and vanilla. Set aside.

Let chocolate and milk cook for about 5 minutes until chocolate is fully melted and is almost at boil.

Then add about 3 TB of the warm mixture to eggs/sugar, 1 TB at a time. You want to add slowly as to not scramble your eggs.

Once you've added the 3 TB, then start adding this mixture back into saucepan. Be sure to stir constantly until it's fully incorporated.

Cook for another 5 -6 minutes on medium low until it thickens a bit.

Cool mixture overnight in your refrigerator.

Pour into your ice-cream machine the following day, and follow the instructions.

And you're done!

This recipe makes 5 cups of ice cream.

Brisket is Easy!

The first time I made brisket it was so-so. It had nice flavor but was ropey and chewy. The second time was a success. The secret to brisket is in the cooking time (long) and the temperature (low). It's in the oven for 4 - 5 hours.

I made the following brisket for my husband for Passover.

I used a 4-lb brisket.

Dry off brisket, and season with salt/pepper, chili powder, paprika and garlic powder. I didn't even measure. I just sprinkled the spices until the brisket was nice and sandy.

After that I combined the following ingredients in a medium size bowl

2 cups tomato juice
3 TB Worcestershire sauce
1 12 oz. beer (I used Sam Adams because it was in my refrigerator)
2 TB light brown sugar

Place brisket in large roasting pan, and pour above mixture over top. Add a few onions, peeled and quartered, and place in 300 degree oven covered with tinfoil

Cook for 4 1/2 hours

Remove foil and cook for another 35 minutes.

The brisket will brown on top.

Transfer brisket to carving board. Pour liquid into medium sauce pan, and keep warm on stove.

Slice brisket against the grain, and serve on large platter. Pour some of the roasting liquid on top, and place the rest in a bowl or gravy boat for those who want more at the table.

If you want to add potatoes, please do!

I added 1 lb of baby Yukon gold potatoes to the roasting pan after three hours. They were delicious.

In addition to the potatoes and brisket, I served string beans with lots of butter. The perfect complement.

Bacon Egg and Cheese Pasta

Carbonara is yummy. If you have not had it, you need to fix that immediately.

Few things taste better then the combination of eggs, bacon, cheese and pasta.

My husband makes it from time to time. It's a special treat.

There are just a few ingredients, so spend time and money on getting the best ingredients

1 medium onion, diced
6 slices bacon (cut into 1/4 inch strips, and do splurge on the good, thick kind)
4 egg yolks (try to use the freshest eggs possible, or even better go and get them at the farmer's market)
1 cup pecorino cheese
1/2 cup salted pasta water
1 lb pasta (spaghetti will work)
1 TB chopped parsley
salt and pepper to taste

Fill large pasta pot with water and bring to a boil. At the same time, cook bacon in large sauté pan. Cook until brown. Remove bacon, and then add onion. Cook onion for 5 minutes until soft. Add bacon back to pan. Turn heat off.

In a medium sized bowl whisk eggs with cheese and set aside.

Once water boils, add a healthy amount of salt, and cook pasta. When pasta is done, reserve 1/2 cup of water when you drain it. Add pasta to large sauté pan toss with bacon and onion, and then add eggs/cheese mixture. The heat from the pasta will cook the egg, so just mix around for about 3-5 minutes to make sure you don't get scrambled eggs. Add pasta water. A creamy sauce will develop.

Add salt, pepper and parsley at the last minute, toss, and serve.

Happiness at Steak

Ever go to a restaurant and have a salad so completely delicious and fantastic that it transcends saladness and becomes something more akin to nirvana? A salad so remarkable that it couldn't possibly have been good for you? Silly, that's 'cause it wasn't good for you at all! That feeling of virtue you experienced while passing over the "Entrees" section of the menu in favor of the "Entree Salads" section has you all confused. In many cases, you actually could have had any number of seafood options, half a roast chicken sans skin, a small filet mignon or - gasp - a sandwich on actual bread for fewer calories and fat grams than you just ingested in...wait for it...salad dressing.

Because that's the thing, isn't it? It was just the dressing. Barring other ingredients we all know are bad for us like fried chicken, gobs of cheese or french fries (I swear, there's a place near my house that puts fries on its steak salad...e-mail me. I'll tell you where to find it), it was probably the dressing that single-handedly took your sensible, practically vegetarian dinner and turned it into a Big Mac with large fries.

It's just so crazy because salad dressing's sole purpose is to impart flavor, but, typically, it's primary ingredient is oil. Oil, while lovely and necessary in many cooking scenarios, isn't really all that tasty. Making your own salad dressing could not be easier but I can hardly think of any trick in your cooking arsenal that you'll get more mileage out of. Plus, people ooh and ahh like you just Mastered the Art of French Cooking when you give them fresh salad dressing when all you really did is whisk some stuff together. Plus, making your own dressing allows you to invert the traditional 4-parts-oil-to-one-part-vinegar dressing ratio on its ear in favor of your waistline and cardiovascular health!

Check out the following recipe for a lovely steak salad - my favorite kind of fatty salad - only without the fattiness. Choose lean steak, hard or crumbly cheeses and lovely, fresh, delicious, low fat homemade dressing and run with it from there.

Bistro Steak Salad with Horseradish Vinaigrette

Ingredients:

1 16 oz. steak (my preference would be a NY strip, fat trimmed AFTER cooking or a skirt steak)

red wine vinegar

kosher salt

fresh cracked black pepper

4 cups arugula

3 roma tomatoes, quartered lengthwise

1/2 cup sliced cucumber

1/3 cup shredded carrots

1/2 onion, sauteed in cooking spray until browned

1/4 cup crumbled blue cheese

about 12 Kalamata olives, chopped

1/2 cup fresh croutons (I judge you if you use croutons from a box...might as well put balsa wood on your salad)

3-4 T. Homemade horseradish vinaigrette (as below)

Instructions:

Sprinkle steak with red wine vinegar, salt & pepper. Grill to your liking. Allow to rest 5 - 10 minutes before slicing into 1/2" slices.

In the meantime, sautee onions until evenly browned. Remove from heat and allow to cool. Toss arugula & vegetables, blue cheese, olives & onions together in a medium mixing bowl. Add 2 T. dressing, toss again. Add croutons. Toss. Taste and add more dressing if desired. Top the salad with 1/4 to 1/2 of the steak, depending on appetite.

Horseradish Vinaigrette

3 T. Red Wine Vinegar

1 1/2 tsp. wostershire sauce

2 tsp. dijon mustard

2 T. prepared horseradish (or more, to suit your taste)

1 clove garlic, chopped

1/2 tsp. Kosher Salt

1/2 tsp. fresh cracked black pepper

1 1/2 T. Olive Oil

Instructions:

Combine first 7 ingredients in a bowl with high enough sides to allow for whisking. Drizzle olive oil slowly into mixture, whisking quickly and constantly. Oil is fully emulsified when it is no longer visible but dressing is thickened. Chill until ready to use.